When Peter saw him, he asked, “Lord, what about him?” Jesus answered, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.” — John 21:21-22 (NIV)

As I listened to the sharing from the other members of our group, I got an all-too-familiar sinking sensation in my gut. Some rejoiced over the completion of an advanced degree while others shared new and interesting prospects on their horizons. But for my husband and me, we didn’t have exciting news to share. We had just passed through a challenging season. There had been happy highlights, but they were tempered with health scares and the passing of my mother. 

“It’s okay,” I kept reassuring myself, “you’ve been navigating the path God has chosen for you.” Normally this would be enough for me to find peace. But lately I’d found myself looking around and thinking God chose all the happy, bright paths for everyone else and left me the dull, dreary one.

No one wins in the comparison game. I know that. When we compare ourselves to others, we forget that our situations are not identical. We match our beginnings with others’ endings. We liken our hard season of life to another’s easy one. We forget we didn’t all start from the same place or with the same resources. But even more importantly, we forget Jesus calls us to different destinies.

After His resurrection, Jesus reinstated Peter as an apostle. In the process, He revealed Peter’s destiny:

Very truly I tell you, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.” Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God. Then he said to him, “Follow me!” (John 21:18-19 NIV)

Jesus revealed a challenging path for Peter ~ he would die for his faith. And according to early church historians, Peter did die, by crucifixion, in Rome. 

I love Peter’s response to Jesus, because it is so like mine:

Peter turned and saw that the disciple [John] whom Jesus loved was following them. (This was the one who had leaned back against Jesus at the supper and had said, “Lord, who is going to betray you?”) When Peter saw him, he asked, “Lord, what about him?” (John 21:20-21 NIV)

When facing such a heavy challenge, Peter quickly deflected and started looking at the people around him. What about John? Will he also have a challenging destiny? Or is it just me? And Jesus’ reply to Peter holds true for me as well:

Jesus answered, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.” (John 21:22 NIV)

Jesus calls Peter, and us, to focus on our own path, the one He chose for us. And here is a hard truth: some people’s destinies may be more challenging than others. Unlike Peter, John escaped martyrdom and died of natural causes. But both apostles honored Jesus by faithfully living out the destiny He gave them. 

Jesus calls us to the same destination, but chooses different destinies to get us there.

Each of our paths will have peaks and valleys, roses and thorns. Some of us will ultimately have more challenging destinies than others. But all of our paths lead to the same destination: eternal life with Jesus (John 14:3). The question we should ask ourselves is the same one Jesus asks of us: Will you follow me on the path I chose for you? No matter where the path leads, it can comfort us to know we won’t walk it alone. Jesus is with us, every step of the way.

Lord, it is so easy for us to get caught in the comparison trap. Please help us remember Your faithfulness as you lead us all to eternal life with You. Help us stay focused on the path You chose for us, and may we glorify You as we follow it. In Jesus’ name, Amen.