How Seeing Our Worth Through Jesus’ Eyes Can Boost Our Self-Confidence

It’s one of my earliest childhood memories. Our teacher asked us to write our numbers and then draw different images to represent them. So with all my first-grade enthusiasm, I dove right in. But when I got to the twenties, I found it difficult to think of new images. I’d already used all the shapes I knew ~ and then exhausted my knowledge of other objects commonly known by first graders. Not only that, but my very full paper didn’t have room for me to continue. 

In a panic, I turned to a classmate for advice. His words sent a spark of fear deep inside me. We were only supposed to go as high as twelve. Struck with remorse, I tried to erase the extra numbers and images. But to my horror, I learned that the crayon I used to draw my images didn’t erase. Now my paper had holes in it! Completely distraught, I turned in my paper. That night I couldn’t sleep because I felt certain I had disappointed my teacher. 

My earliest memory revolves around a fear of failure. This fear of failure became a driving force throughout my life. I became the university student who read every footnote, did every extra credit assignment, and memorized everything. As an employee I arrived first, and left last. I willingly took on extra work and went over and beyond expectations. 

While on the outside I looked like I had it all together, on the inside I was drowning in self-doubt and anxiety. Hiding my weaknesses and doubts kept me from drawing close to God and other people. And even though I achieved success, I didn’t feel joy or peace.

I wish I could say I left these ways behind me when I became a Christian, but in some ways they intensified. I read in Mark 7:37 that Jesus did everything well and felt an added burden to not let God down by failing to do the same.

I hoped to conquer my doubts by pushing myself to achieve. But each success placed higher expectations on me, and I became even more afraid of failure. On any given day, my confidence soared or plummeted based on my successes or failures. For many years I felt trapped in a never-ending drive to achieve. Believing that achievements define our value, or that success builds confidence, are lies from Satan.

Jesus brought me healing when I embraced these truths:

I am both worthy and inadequate. 

The value of something is determined by how much someone is willing to pay for it. The Apostle Peter spoke of our worth when he wrote these words:

For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your ancestors, but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect. (1 Peter 1:18-19 NIV)

God determined our value when He paid the price ~ the precious blood of Jesus. That value is fixed ~ it can’t be increased by our successes, or diminished by our failures. 

I’m also inadequate because I am absolutely incapable of earning my salvation, eternal life, or providing for any number of my daily needs. Only God can meet all of our needs (Philippians 4:19). 

It’s a bit ironic, but accepting my inadequacy actually made me more confident. Because when I stopped hiding my weaknesses, I became more dependent on the Lord and drew closer to other people. 

As I have learned to accept my inadequacy, this Scripture has become a source of strength:

Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. (Hebrews 4:16 NIV)

Our relationship with God is a hierarchy. He does sit on a throne. But it is a throne of grace. We can approach this throne with confidence knowing God has already determined our worth through the blood of Jesus. And wherever we feel inadequate, He is willing to extend mercy and grace to help us. 

Wherever our journeys take us next, I pray we can embrace both our worth and our inadequacies. May these lead us to confidently approach the throne of the One who loves us and leads us home.